Holly Steffen, birth doula and photographer: [almost] certified

Saturday, July 24, 2010

I mailed in my certification packet and now I'm sitting on pins and needles-- waiting to hear.

my mission

I went to visit a friend and her son last night at Oswego Hospital....

Every. Single. Time. I walk in those doors, I feel a flood of emotions.

This is where I gave birth to my first child.

Borderline gestational diabetic.

39weeks. Cytotec. External monitors. Pitocin. Demerol. Epideral. Internal monitors.

Pushed over 2 hrs. No baby.

Hand gently placed on my leg, with a worried/sappy look: "Don't worry, we'll get this baby out"

"Don't worry.... don't worry... don't worry" It was echoed as if shouted from a mountaintop.

I didn't want my baby OUT. I wanted my baby ALIVE.

Rushed to the operating room.... I felt relieved, I was listening to the Drs like a good patient.

Now I feel sad. I feel like I let my baby down.

This is what keeps me going...... That little man.

I vow to help every woman who delivers at Oswego Hosp to have the births they want.

Things happen. Plans have to change.

But, I can be a support that won't.

And, each woman that I help can be assured she did a great job.

Saturday, July 24, 2010

[almost] certified

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